As A Robinson Crusoe

Agashe.Co's Sandal & Bucket Hat ~ HM's Sunnies & Canvas Bag ~ Jochebed.Id's Cooky Fan

Aye Mates!

How are you? I hope all is well.

As for myself, lots of things happened ever since my last post or in other words "after 23".

First, I resigned from my last job and company and move to other company (still a bank doe #banker lol.. nope). 25th October was my last day and marked my 1 year 5 months working in the previous bank. To be very honest, I don't know how to feel. I'm excited for the new adventure and challenges but at the same I'm quite heavy-hearted leaving the bank, it's been like my comfort zone (even though the job desc is quite risky lol but the people has always been like a family for me). This mixed feelings are just so weird and hard to digest especially I just started my new job (by the time I'm writing this, I'm on my 2nd day btw), can't help but feeling somehow homesick? Yes, you may laugh at me for saying homesick right after resigning. It taught me loads of stuff theoretically and emotionally. Felt like it shaped me to the person I am now (?) woww~ can't believe I said that. 

Second, I started working at other bank. I joined their MT (Management Trainee) Program to become a RM (Relationship Manager). Inspired by the peoples from the previous bank, trying to challenge myself to becoming a RM as well. I'm currently on my 2nd day of training or working and had loads of doubts already HAHAHAHAAA I adore you dear RM and every single soul in my previous bank for doing this as your daily job #lebaychelle but tbh I'm still struggling and trying to comprehend every single things given, like it's really challenging because it's something out of my comfort zone but nope, not trying to give up but I'll try to give my best and let God do the rest and He placed me here and I believe He has His plan for me here #AMEN

Third, can't you believe it but I've been less Bucin (Budak Cinta = Love Slave) for Kpop lately HAHAHAHAAA. I don't know how to feel tbh. It's been such a while since the last time I stalk BTS, Kang Daniel, DPR, Gray, etc on Instagram and Twitter. I don't know why, this is weird like this is so not Michelle Sanjaya the Bucin. I used to be very update on what's been going around my bias' life but not anymore like I rarely know what's up these days. Maybe I've been living under the rock lately?

Fourth, I go private on my Instagram! Yes, you read it correctly "Private" no longer business profile "Blogger" for @michellesanjaya. Why? Even my family asked me this, so let me explain here. For me having the title "Blogger", I feel pressured I guess? Like having these 3/3 photos that matched on the feeds, the filter to match the whole mood or feeds, the pressure on how I look or present myself in the photos, my mom too like to brag to her friends "ey my daughter is a blogger leh". Well actually no one pressure me directly but my own thoughts indirectly pressure my own self? I don't know how to put this into words. Also when I had my business profile, I knew how many people visited my profile but WHY YOU DON'T FOLLOW ME LAH? HAHAHAAA no lah, just kidding, just feel like for the first time I want to go private with my life because of this words that I stumbled upon Dean's Instagram MV:

"These days knowing more makes you more miserable"

"Posting these photos but no one knows my hidden feelings behind it"

"Sometimes I feel alone even when I'm with lots of people, like Robinson Crusoe"

Dean, it's very deep and just hit so right. It's so true, especially when I posted all of my photos stock where I'm on hip places looking cool and enjoying my life but in reality I'm just in my office. working overtime. procrastinating. lol. Almost none of my stories were also real time these days because I'm trying to live the moment and just spend quality time with the loved ones or purely enjoying myself instead of thinking the filters, editing, caption for it right that time. Even tough some are also real time due to certain events. One thing I want to inform you is don't judge people from their Instagram because you don't know the what happened behind a photo. Don't let the internet rush you because everything looks perfect on Instagram because no one is posting their failure on Instagram.

I should stop here. I could go on until dawn probably. Yes. I wrote too much. But I'm open to comments, let me know what'd you think, let's exchange thoughts? I would love to hear from your point of view. Surprise me and let's be friend~

Thank you and have a great day

-Cheers, Michelle

Instagram | Youtube | Twitter | Pinterest | My Online Shop

Carousell & Snapchat: Booitsmichelle

Next Chapter

Zara's Shirt ~ HM's Pants ~ Stradivarius' Heels

Aye Mates!

How are you?? I'm fine and feeling better and relieved. Why?? I just graduated from college or uni life!! Had my thesis defense last 3 weeks and thank God I passed with a great remarks (at least that's what I think and I don't need anyone's approval regarding it). I've been feeling so stressed and depressed for the thesis defense because I'm afraid that I won't make it and can't answer the questions that the lecturer gives, but thank God all went well and I could answered them. I don't feel nervous days before the thesis defense but when I arrived at my campus on the day, I'm shaking like crazy almost in the verge of crying. That's also one of the reason why I've been so inactive lately. Anyway I'm finally so relieved and happy that I graduated. 

So what's now? what's next for me? I have a job, a real proper job at a bank. I know some of you might think why don't you focus on your blog or youtube or just be a content creator? Well my friends that's like my ultimate goal in life but for now I'm seeking experiences too for my resume. Bank has always been my goal as an accounting student (let me repeat my accounting student side only). I landed a job at one of my dream bank and in the division that I wanted. So all good for now. Even tough the job is challenging because it's not my expertise but one thing for sure is that I want to learn as much as I can while I have the times. I'm actually a contractor there so I'm not a permanent staff yet which really makes me scared for what's coming after the contract end, but I don't want to think about it much. Since it could affect my mental health sooner or later and my resolution for 2018 is to BE POSITIVE after all. So for now I'm writing a new chapter after uni life, wish me luck and all the best.

How about you? What are you currently doing? Are you enjoying it? Does it make you happy?

-Cheers, Michelle

Instagram | Youtube | Twitter | Pinterest | My Online Shop

Snapchat & Carousell: Booitsmichelle

Hang in There

H&M's Dress & Choker ~ Vans Shoes ~ Thrifted Parka

Aye Mates!

How’s life? Mine has been okay I guess. Still struggling with my thesis proposal doe, but at least I am determined that I’m going to do qualitative research based thesis since I’m not that good with math but yet I’m an accounting student lol. So that’s for the update of my life. How about yours? Let me know, I’m curious!

As from my last video “Office Look Makeup Tutorial + WorkingFrom Home vs Going to The Office #ChellesThoughts”, ps go click the link and watch it, don’t forget to give it a thumbs up and subscribe to join me familia. I created a new series called #ChellesThoughts, it’s about my personal thoughts regarding certain topics and yesterday I talked about working from home compared to going to the office. I personally prefer going to the office since I have the excuse to buy new clothes for work lol even tough working from home is the best thing on earth since you don’t have to wake up early in the morning (talking about flexible working hours). Going to the office here for me means working for a company, I prefer that because I get stable income and I think that what’s really matter to me. Working from home here means being a full-time blogger and youtuber etc, I know some of you here earns more by doing blog and youtube rather than basic workers, but since I’m not that famous (HA!) I don’t really earn much #letsbereal. 

The reason why I’m doing blog and youtube at the first place is because I just want to channel out my personal style and photography. Since I’m very interested with fashion, photography, beauty and writing ever since I was a kid. Blogging and youtube channel are my platforms to channel out all of that, at first I didn’t know that people notice my blog or ever read it, I’m doing it purely just for fun. When I first started blogging some of my friends talk said nasty stuff and I was afraid that they’ll unfriend me so I took a break and wrote down my blog on private. As I grow up I realized why hide when this is what I’m good at, this is me and the only thing I can be proud of so I started to make my blog public gain. Who knows turns out there are people that share the same interest and stories as I do. I’m really grateful for every single one of you that read my blog and watches me on my youtube channel. Who knows from blogging and youtube I could make some virtual friends (I’m very socially awkward unicorn in real life) here and it’s so much fun! So yes I never thought of earning income from blogging and youtube. I’m so thankful as well for all brands that ever collabing with me. 

If I could go back and time travel, here’s what I would say to my 12-years-old self “hang in there! Just keep doing what you always do. As long as it makes you happy, just do it. What others said about you and your life doesn’t really matter. There will always be people that hate your or jealous of you, you can’t always please everyone and it’s okay. Be yourself no matter what. It’s your life. Make the most out of it.”

This is quite a long post eh? Wish could write longer version of history of TheSwaggieUnicorn, what’d ya think? Let me know and have a great day ahead.

-Cheer, Michelle

Instagram | Youtube | Twitter | Pinterest | My Online Shop

Snapchat & Carousell: Booitsmichelle